I have no word to put in the above blank. Every word I would like is not appropriate. Every word that would be appropriate does not suffice. I have no words except for blank. There are a lot of [BLANK]s that are going into ministry. Allow me to hop on my soapbox for a moment.

Last week I returned to Central Bible College (my alma mater, CBC from here on out) for the first time in a long time. There were a couple of youth leaders who were leading worship and speaking in their class chapel and I was thrilled to get the opportunity to support them. Upon entering the campus, a lot of the reason why I disliked CBC came rushing to the forefront for me. Primary reason, there are a lot of [BLANK]s going into ministry.

It seems that just like Summer Camp, CBC has a way of honoring the loudest or the one who can garner the most attention. I don't think this is a conscious effort on the part of the administration but I can remember talking with a couple people afterward and I told them, "If you were to ask everyone in this room to see who the successful people in ministry would be, I bet you that would say the people who are being the loudest or those who can get the most attention. Not that guy who is sitting by himself in prayer." They both agreed. While there, this became a bit of a tick for me. It was driving me crazy how obnoxious a couple of the seniors who were by me were being. There was no regard for anyone else. It was free reign in the commons. IT WAS DRIVING ME NUTS!

When I went to chapel, a couple of guys sat next to me and throughout most parts of the service, they were completely inconsiderate and rude. Once worship began, a song with an upbeat tempo, Mr. Obnoxious Clapping Guy sounds off. I thought we were done with that when we were 12 but that's just me. As soon as everyone else joined in, he quit. Seems the attention seeking plan was foiled by genuine response. Bummer. Here is where all of this started to turn for me though. As soon as the slow songs began, he was in the zone. He and Jesus. Dead eyed (I had a secret desire to clap really loud). Apparently on the slow songs count. They mean more to the LORD than the fast ones. Afterall, those are worship and the others are praise. :)

Throughout the sermon there were a couple of asinine comments that were made in the midst of the sermon. It took everything within me not to say something. When ministry time came though, he was ready to go. Ready to be with Jesus again.

I decided to go to lunch in Z's (the commons area) with a couple of youth leaders since I was on campus and have the opportunity to reminice a bit more. More of the above ensued. Loud ruckuses. Yell. Noise. Yell. Noise. Get attention. Yell. Noise. Ruckus. It was interesting to see it all and think that here in lies the future pastors of America. The shepherds. Those who will call people to follow them as they follow Christ. In this room. Noise. Ruckus. Yell.

I've had multiple conversations with friends of mine who never graduated or regret the experience they had at CBC once they did. It seems nearly everyone hated "the switch" that those who were leading in ministry would flip. In one moment, they could be loud, hateful, obnoxious, rude, criticize those who are leading and in the next moment completely enthralled with Jesus and directing everyone to follow them into His presence. In one particular conversation, a friend of mine was recalling how someone who lead worship on campus acted like a non-believer outside of it. Her exact words, "I could never take him serious because I knew who he was off the stage. I knew his heart." Once on the stage and the lights and sound were clicked on, he was good to go. Off the stage, power down. Click it off. Back to normal.

I say all this because I hate "the switch." It drives me nuts. I can't stand the person who is willing to cuss you out and then call you to "watch your speech becuase you can't bless and curse with the same." Or one would beat those who are down, openly criticize and mock future comrads and then would ask us to respond to the love of Christ for all the beat up and downtrodden. You can't escape who you are. You can't escape your personality. We may be able to flick it on and off in our mind but eventually it catches up to us. Those of us who are in ministry or training to do so can quickly become "professional" about how we live our lives. In one moment we can "be doing our job" and in the next moment "be living our lives." When those two don't mesh up then we can completely undermine the calling to which we are attaining to. It seems in what I know about Jesus that there are no medals, prizes, crowns or kingdoms given to those who are the loudest or have the best education. It seems to be given to whoever fastens themself to Jesus the most. In the fast and the slow songs. In the caf and at the altar. In the pew and on the streets. Those who hold closest to Jesus are those who inherit the Kingdom. Not those who make the most noise.

I know in saying all I've said, I can come off a bit judgmental. I've admittedly had my moments (of which my friend Jack will attest). But when our prevailing culture is honoring those those who make the most noise or who can create the most attention for themselves, then we are regressing to something that is far away from Jesus would have wanted (something I need to take into account when looking at those students who are going to lead the ministry in theBURN). If I have erred in what I have said or have overstepped some bounds and become hostile, then please accept my humble apology. I'm trying not to judge a person while asking for a swtich in our culture. That can be tough. Nothing annoys me more though then when those who expect to have attention given to them when they minister are not willing to do the same for others (like checking your phone during a sermon and asking that others would not do the same). These are the things that drive people nuts about pastors and ministers. This is what people see as an issue with the institution.
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Now playing: Hillsong United - Came To The Rescue